Letter to the buzz: A Canadian’s humorous take on why the US shouldn’t join Canada

As the US continues to be a topic of conversation in Canadian circles—especially with President Donald Trump’s frequent comments about Canada becoming the 51st state—we’ve received a hilarious and insightful letter from a Canadian expat living in Washington State.

Jane Thompson shares this lighthearted yet eye-opening perspective from someone who’s been living south of the border for a decade. Her experiences living in the US are a funny reminder of what makes Canada—and its boundaries—worth protecting.

Read on to see why, according to her, the US might need to stay just where it is:

You cannot let the US become part of Canada. I’m an expat from Victoria and a UVic grad who has been living in Washington for 10 years.

Please take it from me that you need to protect the borders. Aside from the gun laws, Elon Musk as the new VP, debates on abortion, women’s rights, and poor education—there are several significant issues going on here in the US.

Here are a couple of horrors I’ve realized since moving here:

Seattleites think it’s acceptable to use sausage or white gravy instead of brown gravy on poutine. This is sold in restaurants here. It’s disgusting, and no one seems to understand how disgusting it is.

Americans are very chatty and loud. Recently, I went to Thrifty’s in Sidney near my dad’s house when visiting. The quietness astounded me.

My husband is American, and he didn’t seem to realize that we don’t chat, make small talk, or draw attention to ourselves in normal public settings.

If you think people from Northern Alberta or Sooke are a bit strange, wait until you see rednecks from the sticks. They’re very weird.

Civil War-era memorabilia on display, “DON’T TREAD ON ME” flags, and the belief that the most important thing is to carry around a gun in public. Oh, and the casual racism.

Americans are very misinformed and seem to think we all say “ABOOT,” and they refer to all back bacon as “Canadian Ham.” Other than that, Washington is a lovely place.

The Orcas Islands, wineries, mountain ranges, and ski hills are all beautiful. Also, the US has better tacos, southern food, and cheap California produce.

The cheaper gas, groceries, and cost of living are all bonuses too. I hope you have a nice time if and when you visit. I miss getting a double-double and how clean the highway roadsides are in BC.

Let Oregon, California, New York, Massachusetts, and Washington in if it comes down to it.